Looking Back: Ming Surprises Chik

August 9, 2008, Saturday.--- Days before this day, I already felt that something special's gonna happen. I was just not sure what it is until my look-alike guy from Boracay came from behind while I was sitting on one of the plant boxes at SM Mall of Asia.

Actually, I don't know how to start sharing this story. BASTA! Hehehe.

A week before August 9, JR already asked a list of pasalubong that I wanted. He said it's better to be ready if ever he receives a notice from his office that he will be sent back to Manila. Oh, ok. But I remember asking him about when he'll come home, he said, "October". Hahaha. So I gave him my list. Then he told me, "Uy, lumabas naman kayo ni Ate next Saturday." And why?! JR said he just wanted us to look for a nice polo that he could wear on Ate Sheila's (his Ate's sister-in-law) wedding on August 16 (one week after August 9). He even set the time--which is very unusual. Mga taong walang oras. But who am I to say no? He instructed me to wait for his Ate's call. Ok ok.

And then he said he's so excited to see me when he gets home on August 15. "Countdown tayo!" Eh di countdown... 15 days! From then on, he was always asking me, "Ilang araw na lang?" Yun pala, mas maaga ng 7 days yung pag uwi niya. JR talaga.

I was already having an idea that he'll be coming home very SOON. Tuesday of that week, he asked me if I could buy a travel bag and send it to him through LBC, ASAP. Wah. Thanks for understanding that I didn't have enough time to do that. :)

Thursday came, Lhen (his Ate) and I haven't planned things yet. I was too busy, while her phone was always out of reach. I only knew that we will meet at MoA, 5pm on Saturday. That's it.

Friday: I got a text from JR saying we won't be talking over the phone that night, because he has an event with his friends. Ok... then I learned.. Las-shing daw siya. Hay naku. And maybe because of the alcohol-intake, the clue words just came out from him. He told me that "tomorrow" I will know and understand why all these things had to happen. Huli! Still, I didn't spoil the excitement I was feeling. Tamang hinala lang. :D

Saturday: Last Saturday work of Diwa. I was supposed to teach Issa for her exams, but I canceled it just to attend to my appointment with Lhen. After lunch, JR and I were constantly texting each other. He said he wasn't able to go to work because of hangover, but he still dropped by his office to get something.

With my Diwa friends, I went to Timezone Greenbelt 3 to play arcade, and to wait for 5pm. JR and I talked until 3pm (i think). He ended our conversation because he said he needed to go somewhere. Kwento na lang daw later. Uyy, sasakay na siguro ng plane yun! hahaha. Arcade.arcade.arcade.

And then at about 4:30 or 5pm, Lhen called using Ken's phone. She told me that they're already on their way to MoA. So I headed off to our meeting place and waited for them. Hmmmm...

I bet you already know what happened next. I was sitting on the plant box near McDo when Lhen called. She said they've just parked their van and they'll be there in a few minutes. And then JR called. "Asan na si Ate? San daw kayo magkikita?" were his lines. I was still talking to him when I saw Lhen and her family coming to me. "Andito na sila!" I greeted the kids with a hug.

Then I turned at my back, and saw the BIG SURPRISE.

Hihihihi. Kilig. That day was a blast. Except for the... hah.forget about it, girl.

Together Again

After more than a year of living far from each other, JR and Donna are together again. Hehehe. They've got to be ready with endless siomai, movies, late-night gimiks, pizza, shakes, pasta, walkathons, church mass, NBA games, pc games, sweet moments, crying sessions, rounds of wrestling, debates, and fights.

Well, he's been here for only two saturdays, but we've already watched two movies, and, dated and fought n-times. I told myself that I would try my best to make things different from the way they were before. Of course, for the better. Uhm, JR, do you think I would succeed? hehehe. You'll help me out in this, right? :D

It would be a lot different from our college days. Because we are both working now, thinking of how far our salaries would bring us. The level of stress will also be different, obviously. Whatelse? We're already in our 20s--we're not teens anymore. His world will also be a lot BIGGER---he won't be as isolated as he was like when he was in Boracay.

I'm just hoping this would help us improve "JR and Donna", as well as "JR" and "Donna". More prayers. More love.

Welcome home! And a BIG THANKS for the surprise. Will be posting the story as soon as I get the pics from you. I'm thinking you still have time to drop by this blog--this link is in your URL history list.hehehe. :D

A Letter to the Toilet

Dear Toilet,

Thank you for letting me sit on you this evening. You are such a blessing for people who can't find a good place to be alone. For the little time that I was sitting on you, I was able to cry my heart out. I got the chance to think about how I really feel about the happenings around me.

Thanks a lot, my dear Toilet, for catching all the tears that I cried a while ago. It made me feel lighter. Yes, I was hurt, but because I know that you're there with me, I felt better.

Next time, I hope we could share our stories with each other, or give advice to each other. I'm looking forward to being your good friend.

I gotta sleep now. I will also be praying to God that all others who are hurting right now will find their own version of you.

Love Lots,

weird_artistic_gal

PHOTO LINK:http://darkcreek.com/files/images/American_Toilet_b.jpg

Out of the Blue Letter

More and more thoughts...

Use the time you have on Earth to make up for your mistakes. Let go of the things that put you down or keep you frustrated. Once or twice is enough. Learn from your mistakes.

Perfection is too far from reality. So don't be frustrated when problems arise or when you are hurt. Dreaming for a perfect happening, person, or anything is almost the same as being infatuated. And we know that infatuation is not true love. It's just loving the idea of being in love.

True love is not thinking about what would give you overwhelming pleasure. True love is about being happy when you make the person dear to you happy---happy in good ways.

Enjoy the things that you have now. Thank God for these blessings, and at the same time take care of them. "Nothing lasts forever"--we hear this statement every now and then. But living by this means treasuring those that you have now, not taking them for granted only because of your selfish desires.

Lumang Tula

I don't know if I would feel proud or embarrassed when I saw this short poem in my files. I just want to laugh at myself using this very straight-to-the-point mushy Tagalog words. Hehehe.

I couldn't remember what exactly made me write this, all I know is that it's about Yui, the Lonely Boracay guy whom I miss.

Kalian kaya kita muling makikita?
Babalik ka ba pa, aking sinta?
Lubos na ang aking pangungulila,
Kaytagal na nang huling mayakap ka.

Dinala mo ang mga pangarap ko,
Pinangako mong hindi ako mabibigo.
Ngunit hanggang kalian tayo ganito,
Bundok at dagat ang sa ati’y naglalayo?

Baunin mo ang aking pag-ibig,
Alam Niya ang tunay kong damdamin.
Hihintayin ko ang muli mong pag-uwi,
Sasalubungin kita ng matamis kong ngiti.

On Getting Hitched

The secret of a good marriage:

INWARD, OUTWARD, UPWARD love.

INWARD--Love yourself. Eat on time. Sleep enough. In other words, take care of yourself. But loving yourself is not the same as being selfish.

OUTWARD--Love others as you love yourself. Take care of other people. "Awayin mo na'ng lahat, 'wag lang ang biyenan mo. Ipagluto mo siya, dalhan mo ng pasalubong, katulad ng pagmamahal mo sa iyong asawa. Mahalin mo siya nang todo, makikita mo, mamahalin ka rin niya ng buung-buo."

UPWARD--Let your love be under the grace of God. If you don't love God, then your love for yourself and for others are meaningless.

A forwarded text message says:

GOD: "No man can ever claim you unless he claims you from me. I reserved a man for you who has my heart and loves me even more than he will love you. I won't give unless he asks you from me. Soon you will know him, I have the perfect time. You're my PRINCESS, my daughter. Let no prince claim you unless he asks you from my hand. For I am your Father, the KING of kings."

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Sunday Blues

Every Little Thing - Dishwalla

Let me in
to see you in the morning light
to get me on and all along the tears they come
see all come
I want you to believe in life
but I get the strangest feeling that you've gone away
will you find out who you are too late to change?
I wish I could be every little thing you wanted
all the time
I wish I could be every little thing you wanted
all the time,
some times
lift me up
just lift me up don't make a sound
and let me hold you up before you hit the ground
see all come
you say your all right
but I get the strangest feeling
that you've gone away- you've gone away
and will you find out who you are too late to change?
I wish I could be every little thing you wanted
all the time
I wish I could be every little thing you wanted
all the time some times
Don't give me up
don't give me up tonight
or soon nothing will be right at all
salvation will you find out who you are too late to change?
I wish I could be every little thing you wanted

Try It On My Own - Whitney Houston

I'm wiser now
I'm not the foolish girl you used to know
So long ago
I'm stronger now
I've learned from my mistakes which way to go
And I should know
I put myself aside to do it your way
But now I need to do it all alone
And I am not afraid to try it on my own
I don't care if I'm right or wrong
I'll live my life the way I feel
No matter what I'll keep it real you know
Time for me to do it on my own
Yeah yeah, mmm, yeah yeah
It's over now
I can't go back to living through your eyes
Too many lies
And if you don't know by now
I can't go back to being someone else
Not anymore
I never had a chance to do things my way
So now it's time for me to take control
And I am not afraid to try it on my own
I don't care if I'm right or wrong
I'll live my life the way I feel
No matter what Im gonna keep it real you know
Time for me to do it
Oh I start again go back to one
I'm running things my way
Can't stop me now, I've just begun
Don't even think about it
There ain't no way about it
I'm taking names, the ones of mine
Yes I'm gonna take my turn
It's time for me to finally stand alone, stand alone
I am not afraid to try it on my own
And I don't care if I'm right or wrong
I'll live my life the way I feel
No matter what I'm gonna keep it real you know
It's time for me to do it
See I'm not afraid

Sometimes Love Just Ain't Enough

I don't wanna lose you,
I don't wanna use you
Just to have somebody by my side
And I don't wanna hate you
I don't wanna take you
But I don't wanna be the one to cry
That don't really matter to anyone, anymore
But like a fool I keep losing my place
And I keep seeing you walk through that door
But there''s a danger in loving somebody too much
And its sad when you know it's your heart you can't trust
There's a reason why people don't stay where they are
Baby sometimes love just ain't enough
Now I could never change you
I don't wanna blame you
Baby you don't have to take the fall
Yes I may have hurt you
But I did not desert you
Maybe I just wanna have it all
It makes a sound like thunder
It makes me feel like rain
And like a fool who will never see the truth
I keep thinking something's gonna change
But there's a danger in loving somebody too much
And it's sad when you know it's your heart you can't trust
There's a reason why people don't stay where they are
Baby sometimes love just ain't enough
And there's no way home
When it's late at night and you're all alone
Are there things that you wanted to say
Do you feel me beside you in your bed
There beside you where I used to lay
And there's a danger in loving somebody too much
And it's sad when you know it's your heart they can't touch.
There's a reason why people don't stay who they are
Cause baby sometimes love just ain't enough.
Baby sometimes love just ain't enough.

Light and Shade - Fra Lippo Lippi

He will paint the light and shades
The colours and the trees
He will climb the steepest hill
Believing what he sees
He will lay down on the ground
Beneath the old oak tree
He will sleep foreverIf you try to set him free
Sail on the wings of a cloud
Where to, well nobody knows
And cry, cry if you want them to see
Die every day to be free
Be proud to wear the colours that you call your own
Be loud, speak out when you want the world to know
Be strong, hold the flame for everyone to see
Be weak, if you want to love.
He will paint the endless sea.
A mystery to me
He will reach out for the sun,
Not dreaming what he sees
He will fall down on his knees
Angel touching ground
Takes him to the other side
Sweet love is coming down.
Sail on the wings of a cloud
Where to, well nobody knows
And cry, cry if you want them to see
Die every day to be free
Be proud to wear the colours that you call your own
Be loud, speak out when you want the world to know
Be strong, hold the flame for everyone to see
Be weak, if you want to love.

Dreaming at Dencio's Part II

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I'm staring out into the night,
trying to hide the pain
I'm going to the place where love
And feeling good don't ever cost a thing
And the pain you feel's a different kind of pain

Well, I'm going home
back to the place where I belong
where your love has always been enough for me
I'm not running from,
no, I think you got me all wrong
I don't regret this life I chose for me
But these places and these faces are getting old
So I'm going home
Well I'm going home

The miles are getting longer, it seems
The closer I get to you
And I've not always been the best man and friend for you
But your love it makes true
and I don't know why
You always seem to give me another try

So I'm going home
back to the place where I belong
where your love has always been enough for me
I'm not running from,
no, I think you got me all wrong
I don't regret this life I chose for me
But these places and these faces are getting old

Be careful what you wish for
'cause you just might get it all
you just might get it all
and then some you don't want
be careful what you wish for
'cause you just might get it all
You just might get it all

So I'm going home
back to the place where I belong
where your love has always been enough for me
I'm not running from,
no, I think you got me all wrong
I don't regret this life I chose for me
But these places and these faces are getting old
But these places and these faces are getting old
So I'm going home
I'm going home

Red Moon

--------------------------------------------------------
"He has been very cruel to me. He keeps on telling me that I don't deserve any attention--because I'm wasted. I'm afraid to tell him that I want to leave him, because he once threatened me that he would kill me and our family if I do that."

"There's this man who appreciates me. I thought I was just looking for a friend but I think I've already fallen for him. The only problem is, we couldn't fight for what we feel. I am married with a notorious guy. He, on the other hand, has already submitted himself to the church. I just wish the right time would come for us."

--------------------------------------------------------

"He told me I'm the one he loves and not the mother of his daughter, who just went abroad to work. A day after we went out for a date, he revealed a news: their having a second baby. But he insisted that i am the one. Will I believe him? Do I deserve this?"

---------------------------------------------

"Hey, please tell boss I'm not going to the office today. I feel sick. . . Actually, I was crying all night. He broke up with me. I did not expect it. It is really painful."

"Please don't tell our friends about this. Please."

"You've seen us that afternoon, right? He's still sweet. Then he did that. I swallowed my pride and went to his place. I waited for hours. When he finally got home, I thought we're gonna talk about our problem. But he pushed me away. I told him I will only leave if he would tell me that he doesn't love me anymore. And he did tell me. Without thinking twice. That's it."

"I need someone to talk to. Please. Thanks."

"You know I'm not getting any younger. At my age, I'm already looking for someone who could see himself spending his life with me. I don't know. I'm lost. I gave my all. But he dumped me."

"You're right. He's planned for this. And he found his last day in our office to be the best time to do it. He gave back my pic. And it was from our back-to-back laminated grad pics. If everything came up to his mind only at that moment, he wouldn't have time to re-laminate my grad pic again."

"I will try to move on. Yes I still love him. So much that all these tears are falling down from my eyes right now."
--------------------------------------------------------

Dreaming at Dencio's

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When you're dreaming with a broken heart
The waking up is the hardest part
You roll out of bed and down on your knees
and for a moment you can hardly breathe
Wondering was she really here
Is she standing in my room?
No, she's not
cause she's gone, gone, gone, gone, gone.
When you're dreaming with a broken heart
The giving up is the hardest part
She takes you in with her crying eyes
then all at once you have to say goodbye
wondering could you stay my love
will you wake up by my side?
No, she can't
cause she's gone, gone, gone, gone, gone.
Do I have to fall asleep with roses in my hand?
Do I have to fall asleep with roses in my hand?
Do I have to fall asleep with roses in my hand?
Do I have to fall asleep with roses in my, roses in my hands?
Would you get them if I did?
No, you won't
Cause you're gone, gone, gone, gone, gone.
When you're dreaming with a broken heart
the waking up is the hardest part.

Q.E.D.

Realize: Colbie Colliat

Take time to realize,
That your warmth is
Crashing down on in.
Take time to realize,
That I am on your side
Didn't I,
Didn't I tell you.
But I can't spell it out for you,
No it's never gonna be that simple
No I cant spell it out for you

If you just realize what I just realized,
Then we'd be perfect for each other
and will never find another
Just realized what I just realized
we'd never have to wonder
if we missed out on each other now.

Take time to realize
Oh-oh I'm on your side
Didn't I, didn't I tell you.
Take time to realize
This all can pass you by
Didn't I tell you
But I can't spell it out for you,
no it's never gonna be that simple
no I can't spell it out for you.

If you just realized what I just realized
then we'd be perfect for each other
then we'd never find another
Just realized what I just realized
we'd never have to wonder
if we missed out on each other now.

It's not always the same
no it's never the same
if you don't feel it too.
If you meet me half way
If you would meet me half way.
It could be the same for you.

If you just realize what I just realized
then we'd be perfect for each other
then we'd never find another
Just realize what I just realized
we'd never have to wonder

Just realize what I just realized
If you just realize what I just realized
missed out on each other now
missed out on each other now
Realize, realize
realize, realize

Hate that I Love You: Rihanna and Neyo

That's much I love you
That's how much I need you
And I can't stand ya
Most everything you do
Make me wanna smile
Can I not like you for awhile
Cuz' you won't let me
You upset me girl
And then you kiss my lips
All of a sudden I forget (that I was upset)
Can't remember what you did
But I hate it...
You know exactly what to do
So that I can't stay mad at you
For too long that's wrong
But I hate it...
You know exactly how to touch
So that I don't want to fuss... and fight no more
Said I despise that I adore you
And I hate how much I love you boy (yeah...)
I can't stand how much I need you (I need you...)
And I hate how much I love you boy (oooh whoah...)
But I just can't let you go
And I hate that I love you so (oooh...)
And you completely know the power that you have
The only one that makes me laugh
Sad and it's not fair
How you take advantage of the fact
That I... love you beyond the reason why (why...)
And it just ain't right
And I hate how much I love you girl
I can't stand how much I need you (yeah...)
And I hate how much I love you girl
But I just can't let you go
But I hate that I love you so
One of these days maybe your magic won't affect me
And your kiss won't make me weak
But no one in this world knows me the way you know me
So you'll probably always have a spell on me...
And I hate that I loveYou soooooooo!
As much I love you (as much as I need you oh...)
As much as I need you (oooh... as so much I love you)
As much I love you (oh...)
As much as I need you
And I hate that I love you soooo
And I hate how much I love you boy
I can't stand how much I need ya (cant stand how much I need you)
And I hate how much I love you boy
But I just can't let you go (but I just can't let you go no...)
And I hate that I love you so
And I hate that I love you so... soo...

Signal Fire: Snow Patrol

The perfect words never crossed my mind,
'cause there was nothing in there but you,
I felt every ounce of me screaming out,
But the sound was trapped deep in me,
All I wanted just sped right past me,
While I was rooted fast to the earth,
I could be stuck here for a thousand years,
Without your arms to drag me out,

There you are standing right in front of me
All this fear falls away to leave me naked,
Hold me close 'cause I need you to guide me to safety
No I won't wait forever
No I won't wait forever

In the confusion and the aftermath,
You are my signal fire,
The only resolution and the only joy,
Is the faint spark of forgiveness in your eyes,

There you are standing right in front of me
All this fear falls away to leave me naked,
Hold me close cause I need you to guide me to safety,

There you are standing right in front of me
All this fear falls away to leave me naked,
Hold me close cause I need you to guide me to safety,
No I won't wait forever
No I won't wait forever
No I won't wait forever

Forget About Me: Little Bit

You said it wasn't
Gonna be like It was before
Then it happened again
Pushing me back
Out the door
Thought it would be
For real this time
Love me forget
About the signs
So now what do I do
Now, that I know
That we're through
Wish that I Could move on
Can't let go It's too strong
Just like that
And then you're gone
Is this how You wanted it to be
Everything you had to say
Sent the tears
Right down my face
Now I'm trying to escape
The misery
Why don't you love me
The way I loved you
It feels so crazy
Cause I dunno
What I did to you
If you're gonna hurt me
Then do it quickly
Cause I'm tired of cryin'
If you don't wanna
Stick around
Then, baby Forget about me
Too late, sorry
I didn't even Have the chance
You said you were happy
Baby I don't understand
Gave you everything You asked for
And was ready To give you a lot more
I would've given The world
Right in the palm Of your hand
Wish that I Could move on
Can't let go It's too strong
Just like that
And then you're gone
Is this how
You wanted it to be
Everything you had to say
Sent the tears Right down my face
Now I'm trying to escape
The misery
Boy My heart was true
And that you can't deny
Don't be a fool
And walk away
From all the lies
It's up to you
Cause heaven knows I've tried
Tell me You're still in love
Yeahhhh Ohh
Forget about me
Forget about me
Oh, baby, oh

Sorry: Buckcherry

Oh I had alot to say
Was thinking on my time away
I missed you and things weren't the same
'Cause everything inside it never comes out right
And when I see you cry it makes me wanna die.
I'm sorry I'm bad, I'm sorry you're blue
I'm sorry about all the things I said to you
And I know I can't take it back
I love how you kiss, I love all your sounds
And baby the way you make my world go 'round
And I just wanted to say I'm sorry.
This time I think I'm to blame
It's harder to get through the days
We get older and blame turns to shame
'Cause everything inside it never comes out right
And when I see you cry it makes me wanna die.
I'm sorry I'm bad, I'm sorry you're blue
I'm sorry about all the things I said to you
And I know I can't take it back
I love how you kiss, I love all your sounds
And baby the way you make my world go 'round
And I just wanted to say I'm sorry.
Every single day I think about how we came all this way
The sleepless nights and the tears you cried
It's never too late to make it right
Oh yeah sorry
I'm sorry I'm bad, I'm sorry you're blue
I'm sorry about all the things I said to you
And I know I can't take it back
I love how you kiss, I love all your sounds
And baby the way you make my world go 'round
And I just wanted to say I'm sorry.
I'm sorry baby.
I'm sorry baby, Yeah.
I'm sorry.

Tired of Being Sorry: Enrique Iglesias

I don't know why
You want to follow me tonight
When in the rest of the world
With you whom I've crossed and I've quarreled
Lets me down so
For a thousand reasons that I know
To share forever the unrest
With all the demons I possess
Beneath the silver moon
Maybe you were right
But baby I was lonely
I don't want to fight
I'm tired of being sorry
Chandler and Van Nuys
With all the vampires and their brides
We're all bloodless and blind
And longing for a life
Beyond the silver moon
Maybe you were right
But baby I was lonely
I don't want to fight
I'm tired of being sorry
I'm standing in the street
Crying out for you
No one sees me
But the silver moon
So far away - so outer space
I've trashed myself - I've lost my way
I've got to get to you got to get to you
Maybe you were right
But baby I was lonely
I don't want to fight
I'm tired of being sorry
I'm standing in the street
Crying out for you
No one sees meBut the silver moon
Maybe you were right
But baby I was lonely
I don't want to fight
I'm tired of being sorry
I'm standing in the street
Crying out for you
No one sees me
But the silver moon


Over You:Daughtry

Now that it’s all said and done
I can’t believe you were the one
To build me up and tear me down
Like an old abandoned house
What you said when you left
Just left me cold and out of breath
I felt as if I was in way to deep
Guess I let you get the best of meeee
Well I never saw it coming
I should have started running
A long, long time agooo!
And I never thought I’d doubt you
I’m better off without you
More than you, more than you know
I’m slowly getting closure
I guess it’s really over
I’m finally gettin’ better
Now I’m picking up the pieces
From spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together
‘Cause the day I thought I’d never get through
I got over you!!!
You took a hammer to these walls
Dragged the memories down the hall
Packed your bags and walked away
There was nothing I could say,
And when you slammed the front door shut
A lot of other’s opened up
So did my eyes so I could see
That you never were the best for meee
Well I never saw it coming
I should have started running
A long, long time agooo!
And I never thought I’d doubt you
I’m better off without you
More than you, more than you know
I’m slowly getting closure
I guess it’s really over
I’m finally getting’ better
Now I’m picking up the pieces
From spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together
‘Cause the day I thought I’d never get through
I got over you!!!
I never saw it coming
I should have started running
A long, long time agooo
And I never thought I’d doubt you
I’m better off without you
And I never saw it coming
I should have started running
I’m finally getting better
Now I’m picking up the pieces
From spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together
And I got over you!!!
And I got over you!!!
And I got over you!!!
The day I thought I’d never get through
I got over you…


Simple Love: Alison Krauss

Little yellow house sittin' on a hill
That is where he lived
That is where he died
Every Sunday morning
Hear the weeping willows cry
Two children born
A beautiful wife
Four walls and livin's all he needed in life
Always giving, never asking back
I wish I had a simple love like that
I want a simple love like that
Always giving, never askin' back
For when I'm in my final hour lookin' back
I hope I had a simple love like that
My momma was his only little girl
If he'd had the money he'd have given her the world
Sittin' on the front porch together they would sing
Oh how I long to hear that harmony
I want a simple love like that
Always giving never asking back
When I'm in my final hour looking back
I hope I had a simple love like that
I want a simple love like that
Always giving never asking back
When I'm in my final hour looking back
I hope I had a simple love like that.


Tattoo: Jordin Sparks

No matter what you say about love,
I keep coming back for more,
Keep My head in the fire,
sooner or later I get what I'm asking for

No matter what you say about life
I learn everytime I bleed
The truth is a stranger
Soul is in danger
I gotta let my spirit be free
To admit that I'm wrong
And then change my mind
Sorry but I have to move on and leave you behind

I can't waste time so give it a moment
I realize nothing is broken
No need to worry about everything
I've done Live every second like it was my last one
Don't look back at a new direction
I love you once needed protection
You´re still a part of everything I do
You're on my heart just like a tattoo
Just like a tattoo
I'll always have you
I'll always have you sick of playing all of these games
It's not about taking sides
when I looked in the mirror, didn't deliver
It hurt enough to think I could stop
Admit that I'm wrong and then change my mind
sorry but I've gotta be strong and leave you behind
I can't waste time so give it a moment
I realize nothing is broken
No need to worry about everything I've done
Live every second like it was my last one
Don't look back at a new direction
I love you once needed protection
You´re still a part of everything I do
You're on my heart just like a tattoo
Just like a tattoo
I'll always have you
I'll always have you
If I live every moment,
It won't change every moment,
Is still a part of me in you
I will never regret you
Still the memory of you marks everything I do. oooh..
I can't waste time so give it a moment
I realize nothing is broken
No need to worry about everything I've done
Live every second like it was my last one
Don't look back at a new direction
I love you once needed protection
You´re still a part of everything I do
You're on my heart just like a tattoo
Just like a tattoo
I can't waste time so give it a moment
I realize nothing is broken
No need to worry about everything I've done
Live every second like it was my last one
Don't look back at a new direction
I love you once needed protection
You´re still a part of everything I do
You're on my heart just like a tattoo,
Just like a tattoo
I'll always have you


Stronger Woman: Jewel

I guess you could say I’m one of those girls
That’s always been with one of those guys
You know the type
Like right now, he sleeps while I write
But it’s better than crying
I’m worn out from trying
From loving a man who always makes it clear
I’m not welcome here
Just till he’s horny and hungry
or needs something cleaned
And you know what I mean
But not tonight
‘Cause come the morning light, oh
I’m gonna love myself more than anyone else
Believe in me, even if someone can’t see
The stronger woman in me
I’m going to be my own best friend
Stick with me till the end
Won’t lose myself again, never, no,
‘Cause there’s a stronger woman,
A stronger woman in me
Light bulbs buzz, I get up
And head to my drawer
I wish there was more
I could say
Another fairytale fades to gray
I’ve lived on hope
Just like a child
Walking that mile
Faking that smile
All the while
Wishing my heart had wings
Well tonight, I’m going to be
The kind of woman
I’d want my daughter to be, oh
I’m gonna love myself more than anyone else
Believe in me, even if someone can’t see
There’s a stronger woman in me
I’m gonna be my own best friend
Stick with me till the end
I won’t lose myself again, never, no
‘Cause there’s a stronger woman,
A stronger woman
This is me, packing up my bags
And this is me, headed for the door
And this is me, the best you ever had
I’m going to love myself
More than anyone else
Believe in me even if someone cannot see
There’s a stronger woman in me
I’m going to be my own best friend
Stay with me till the end
Won’t lose myself again, never, no
‘Cause there’s a stronger woman
A stronger woman
There’s a stronger woman,
A stronger woman in me,Yeah…

I Don't Want to See Myself Singing this Song

Forget About Me - Little Bit

For me, this song is for those who have lost hope. I have not. I wish I would not.

Really intended to write the lyrics in this way.

You said, it wasn't gonna be like it was before.Then it happened again. Pushing me back out the door.Thought it would be for real this time.Love me forget about the signs.So now what do i do? Now that I know that we're through. Wish that I could move on Can't let go, it's too strong Just like that and then you're gone Is this how you wanted it to be? Everything you had to say Sent the tears right down my face Now I'm trying to escape The misery Why don't you love me?The way I loved you It feels so crazy 'Coz I don't know what I did to you If you're gonna hurt me Then do it quickly 'Coz I'm tired of cryin' If you don't wanna stick around Then, baby forget about me. Too late, sorry. I didn't have the chance You said you were happy Baby, I don't understand Gave you everything you asked for And was ready to give you a lot more I would've given you the world Right in the palm of your hand. Wish that I could move on Can't let go, it's too strong Just like that and then you're gone Was this how you wanted it to be? Everything you had to say Sent the tears right down my face Now I'm trying to escape The misery Why don't you love me? The way I loved you It feels so crazy 'Coz I don't know what I did to you If you're gonna hurt me Then do it quickly 'Coz I'm tired of cryin' If you don't wanna stick around Then, baby forget about me.Boy, my heart was true And that you can't deny Don't be a fool And walk away from all the lies It's up to you 'Coz heaven knows I've tried Tell me you're still in love. Why don't you love me? The way I loved you It feels so crazy 'Coz I don't know what I did to you If you're gonna hurt me Then do it quickly 'Coz I'm tired of cryin 'If you don't wanna stick around Then, baby forget about me.Forget about meI really love you.

I'm already drowned in trigonometry here. Help!

Ming-Chik Game: Sudoku Over the Phone

Hahaha! I think we're getting more and more weird as days pass by! Yesterday afternoon, JR asked me about Sudoku techniques--how to start, how to eliminate the possibilities for each square, etc. I thought it was just a sudden "ding!" in his mind that he's playing Sudoku again.


The first time I showed him the puzzle, he gave up. But now he's trying to master it! Goodluck! Hehehe. Peace.

Then when it was already our "telebabad session", he asked me to help him solve the puzzle he got from a newspaper. Duh?! Over the phone?! Again?


So I grabbed the old SUMS-UP Logbook and Paui's pen, and wrote down the numbers as he dictated them.

That's it. I explained every step I made. I was almost shouting the numbers so he could really understand me. After about an hour with a number of REDIALS (because SUN Cellular cuts the line every 20 or 24 minutes of conversation), WE'RE DONE!


Sayang. I should have posted my scratch paper, but I'm camera-less right now. JR made this using MS Excel:


Puzzle 1:

Just this morning, we solved another puzzle, an easy one. This is from the Sudoku software in my PC at the office.

Puzzle 2:

Then I dared him, every Sudoku puzzle that we complete would be equal to one date! Hehehe.

More Sudoku puzzles, more Love!

Our Prayer

glitter-graphics.com

Dear God,

Thank you for this day! Thank you for giving us another chance to experience life.
Thank you for blessing us with people who always make our morning bright; for letting us have someone (each other) to greet us "Good morning! I love you!"; for making us feel loved from the time we wake up 'til we go to sleep.

Lord, we also thank You for guiding our paths. There are times when we are distracted by misleading thoughts, ideas, and happenings, but thanks to You because you help us keep going on.

Sorry for the wrong things we've done--to You, to each other, to other people, and to ourselves. During those times, we forget what we're here for, and what you want us to be---good, loving, and respectful persons.

Sorry for the times that we disregard You as our Lord, when we do not consider You to be more powerful than any of us, and when we deny that our lives here on Earth are not ours, but Yours.

God, we ask You to continuously help us nourish our love for each other, so that our relationship will be like a tree that drops the dried leaves and gives birth to green, healthy leaves. Please give us strength to face all the trials that we will encounter on the following days. Please help us to think right, love right, act right--in Your standards.

Please also guard and bless our family, dearest friends, and even our acquaintances. Making them feel happy and well are part of our mission, so even just in prayers, we want to extend our love for them.

Please bless the people we don't know--the sick, the weary, the hungry, and the confused. If it is Your will that we may serve as their guardian angels, we would love to accept that task. In this way, we would be able to bring back the love You are giving us.

You are the only one that we praise, O God. We are together for the Love of You.

We pray for all of these through the name of your holy Son Jesus Christ, the Holy Spirit, and Mama Mary . . .

Amen. We Love You!

Bora Trip Number 2-Day 1:Getting Away from the City

My second Bora trip was supposed to be a birthday surprise for JR. I already got tickets to Kalibo for me and Tito Mey, but three weeks before March 14, JR learned about it. Okay lang. If he had not had any idea that we were coming, our vacation would have been a disaster.

JR immediately reserved a room at the Loft room of their project, Alta Vista de Boracay, while I tried to finish all my articles for submission so I would not hear any violent reaction from my boss.

The night before March 14 came and I haven't prepared my things yet. I reviewed Issa for her exams until Tuesday of that week. I was so busy with work--my brain had stopped functioning but there are several articles left for me to write.

My First Flight (March 14, Friday)

Morning. I hit the "submit" button for the last set of articles. Rushing, I went back to our home, fixed my things, changed my clothes and said "babye" to my lola and sisters. Hehehe. This is it! I'm on my way to Bora!

I had been feeling very exhausted with all the work that I do---edit and write on weekdays, then tutor students during nights and weekends. Hayyy! Why do I have to go through all these tiring activities? Yet my savings account is almost always empty! Darn. I think I spend too much. Well, this is just for now. I'm happy with my life anyway. I can now afford my own vacation (a part of it at least! hehehe).

The trip was like a date with JR's dad, Tito Mey. Haha. It was him and me the whole trip. We met in Casimiro at lunch time, and took a taxi to the NAIA Centennial Airport. At last! I'm gonna ride an airplane! So we went through the counters and scanning terminals, and waited for our boarding time: 2:30. Also bought brazo de mercedes from Goldilocks--pasalubong for JR. Then we saw Janno Gibbs walking around there. Wala lang. I even had a short conversation with a senior citizen who was with her sick husband (I knew that he's sick, because he's on a wheelchair).

2:40 pm: it's time to board the plane! I was nearly losing the grip of my smile because of excitement. But I didn't want to look ignorant so I tried my best to calm down. We passed through the long tube with the door of the plane on the end. Yeah! The PAL flight attendants welcomed us with their sweet hellos. And when I finally saw the plane's interior. . . Wow. With the cold fog-like smoke coming out from the sides, and the unique smell of the seats, I felt like I was on my way to heaven! hehehe.

We had our seats, fasten our seatbelts, and watched the safety instruction video.

Finally, after experiencing a 20-minute traffic on the runway, flight PAL 325 to Kalibo took off. I was on the clouds! It's just sad that I wasn't able to take pictures. Huhuhu. I didn't bring my jurassic digicam and even Nanay's film-based cam. What I only had with me was the underwater cam that I bought on thursday night. I couldn't even rely on my super old phone. Hay!!!!

After a while, the attendants gave us drinks and snacks. Yummy chocolate mallow pie. Hehehe. Saved the Nutrilicious orange juice pack until I got home... But I think I threw it when I took it out from my bag and told myself I'm going to wash it. Hay!

Then I went to the plane's toilet. Cool! There are ice tubes on the small sink. What are those for? It's also weird that I was swaying while I was sitting on the bowl. haha!

I spent the 20-minute flight chatting with my future in-law. hehehe. He talked about how grateful he is that his son is now an engineer, and that his son is bringing him to the famous Boracay. Sweet...

I haven't finished sipping my Nutrilicious drink when the attendant announced our landing at Kalibo Airport. Few more minutes passed by, the wheels of our aircraft touched the ground, and the plane slowed down as it went straight through the runway. We're now in Kalibo!


Still, no pictures. Hmp. When we entered the hall, men in yellow welcomed us. They are the Kalibo men asking us if we already have our service van to Caticlan. After getting my bag, the guy whom we've talked to assisted us to our van.

Yayks! Both Tito Mey and I are becoming impatient. Whoah! Another 60++ kilometers?! Good thing Tito Mey's on the mood to tell his stories. As the green fields and mountains of Aklan amazed our eyes, Tito Mey remembered his childhood days in Quezon province. After an hour, we saw ourselves passing through the zigzag road whose side is a thin shoreline. We already see the SEA! Twenty to thirty more minutes, we reached Caticlan Jetty Port.

The second trip was not as long as my first trip where we took RORO going to Caticlan. Our travel took only three hours, plus two hours wait at the airport. I knew Tito Mey was so excited to see Bora, so I hurriedly led him to the jetty. The sun's setting already. .. Hay! Gabi na!

Our travel by water took around 15 minutes...Yes! At last! We're in Boracay! But we're not yet at where we're supposed to go. So we took another 10 to 15 minutes tricycle ride to Barangay Balabag. We stopped at the Balabag Church (Holy Rosary Parish, I think). And there, a Tito Mey look-alike guy was standing, waiting for something . . . The BiRthday Celebrant! Hehehe.

JR and his officemates have a new staffhouse. This time, a little far from the beach front. They occupy the whole second floor of a two-storey house--with four (or three only?) bedrooms, two toilets, two bathrooms, and a kitchen/dining/living room! Complete! We dropped our things in one of the bedrooms--their guest room, and headed off to Talipapa to buy lechon manok and beer for his birthday party. Thanks to Kuya Manny aka Bacalso for driving for us!

It was past 8 pm and I was so hungry because I only ate Kariman from Mini Stop for my lunch. Some of JR's visitors already started eating, so I wasted no time--I grabbed a plate, got some pansit, lechon manok, barbeque, and rellenong bangus! Yum! Hehehe.

Had one San Mig Light. That's enough. Party's Over. Day 1's done. Time to sleep.

The Wonder of Bato-Bato-Pick Over the Phone

This is another doodle about love. Well. . .

Bato-bato pick is one of the most beloved games of Pinoy children. I was once an expert of it during my childhood days. But now, this simple one-on-one game made me see wonderful things about me and JR .

We had played bato-bato-pick even before he went away for his work. Now we could only play bato-bato-pick over the phone. Sounds weird? We've tried it, and it's fun.

The first time was when we had a fight. For him to forgive me, he challenged me to play bato-bato pick. The first one to get 10 points wins. If I win, I'm forgiven. So we played. As we went through the game, I noticed how his angry voice turned to cute laughs. He found it funny when I say "bato-bato-pickS". He gradually calmed down. His five straight scissors helped me win. Thanks, Ming!

The second game happened when I got mad because of his incurable sickness (you know what it is!). The bet was only up to 5 points. If he wins, he'll explain his side but I will not scold him. Otherwise, he has to be ready for my litanies. Again I won. Hmmmm. . . My powers are coming back! He had no choice but to explain what happened. He then listened to me as I spoke my heart out--though not hysterical enough to turn him down. I was hurt. But the wound healed after that bato-bato pick.

The third match was just yesterday. This time, it's like a matter of life and death for him. If he wins, we will end our telebabad session and he'll sleep. If I get the win again, he should tell me stories about. . .anything, about us. I have to mention that:we agreed that he should do it right after the bato-bato pick game. So we started. He was leading. It was 0-5 for him. Then I slowly got points, but he's still on the lead. My tears almost wanted to fall down from my eyes--as I felt I was going to lose. After a number of ties, I noticed that he was giving straight "papers." Why?! Oh, it might be his strategy. Or he just wanted me to win again. Until it became 9-all. I thought, I'd give a "stone/rock," so he would win. I did. But to my surprise. . . He gave a "scissor". I won the game! Really thankful that he did not let me cry.

But what really counts is not the number of wins and losses, but. . .

... the honesty in telling our real pick even if we do not see each other's hand;

... the fun of playing that melts our heart and takes away the hurt or anger within it;

... the idea of sacrificing our own win to give way to what the other wants;

... the thought of knowing that whoever wins, the other would still consider doing the consequence for you.

I find it really sweet. Now I know that playing bato bato pick is not just for kids.

Thanks to thethinkingblog.com for the image!

My Long Distance Valentine

We're islands apart. And there's no affordable way to see each other on Valentine's Day. It's a bit sad, frustrating, envying--while I see other girls carrying their bouquets and gifts, walking with their dates. I wonder if there are restos that offer virtual dinners, because I'll definitely reserve a slot. Just to have the chance to spend hearts day with him.

Well, I should still be happy. Because he pampered me almost the whole day, with his mushy and sweet words. It's enough for me to know that he also wanted to be with me. . . But he had to work hard . . . Not just for himself, but for us.

I got his flower gift this morning. Yes, it's one day late. Not his fault though. The package traveled all the way from Boracay. Hayy. . . these three lovely red roses and handwritten card. . . make me feel like he's just right beside me, giving me a warm hug and kiss. Yihee.

It's Fairster Day!

We were mere playmates back in our childhood days. But we snubbed each other when people started to tease us. Then we became casual friends. And later on, became the best of friends. Now, he loves me with all his heart. And I do, too.

-------------
We are best friends, more than just lovers. For four years, we’ve struggled to make our relationship grow. And through all the ups and downs, we believe that we have already built a foundation, strong enough to hold on to each other—OUR FRIENDSHIP.

Young Love Pair
Eighteen years ago, we were only four years old. Our young minds were not yet aware of our future. I didn’t know that we would be boyfriend-girlfriend (or soon-to-be a. . . . hehehe.) All we knew was that we would see each other during summer and Christmas vacation. But I was closer to his ate then. That’s all. At this time, our first picture together was taken.

Then we became grade schoolers. His uncles, aunts, and grandparents, who happened to live just almost in front our home, started to tease us. So the Tonton and Madonna Love Team was launched! The “yihees” made us turn away from each other. But I thought, He’s cute! And without me knowing it before, he also thought, Her puffy and white cheeks are pretty!

Early Teenage Blues
High school came and we rarely glanced at each other. Then, one summer vacation, a neighbor brought the news—JR’s mother was rushed to the hospital, and JR, the ever-loving son, withdrew the money from his savings to pay the bill. I was touched. The more our neighbor talked about how intelligent, smart, and kind JR was, the more I was convinced that I liked him. Again, without me knowing it before, he also started to like me.

From then on, I waited for every vacation. I waited for every holiday. Just to see him. During summer, I went out every afternoon to do some sweeping and gardening. I was lucky if he passed by with his bike. That made each day complete. There were even times when I sat on our wall gate—a perfect place to spot him from his Lola’s yard. What I didn’t know before was that . . . he also looked forward to seeing me every vacation . . . that he rode his bike so he would have a reason to pass by our house, and he always stayed under the langka tree in the front yard just to see me!

JR and I were in third year high school when we got our very first cell phones.He became my virtual pal. I already had an idea that it was him but I didn’t realize it until the day he told me that it’s him. You could not blame me. Is “Tonton” close to “Meynard?” But as far as I could remember, he was the best textmate I ever had. We talked about school—our grades, our teachers, our activities; we talked about NatGeo and Discovery Channel shows—the cheetah, the tallest and biggest in the world, etc; and we shared our thoughts on different things. JR told me about his girlfriend that time. I’m just not that sure if I shared my stories about my former boyfriend who was still courting me then. We shared our dreams with each other—JR wanted to be a civil engineer to make buildings, and told me that he’d build my accounting office someday. He was also the one whom I leaned on to during the scariest nights of my life. At this point, I considered him as my friend. I knew I liked him (And he, too!), but only admiration and friendship were what we could only give each other.

Few months later, a tragedy came. He lost his mom. I could imagine how hard he cried. But I couldn’t do anything but send him and his siblings a letter. He also lost his cell phone during the wake. I thought that was the end of our story. We lost in touch.

Walking Away to Get Closer
After two years, I went to UP and studied college. In 2003, my mom decided to sell our house. We transferred to Las Pinas. Goodbye to all my childhood memories. But hopefully, I’d see Tonton again, I told myself. On the day that we left Laguna, JR’s dad was also on his way home. Then he rode with us in our service. Meaning, their house was just somewhere near LP. I thought again, he’s nearer to me now! But I didn’t have any idea where exactly he was. So I continued my life as if he was just part of my past.

Before the year ended, I was left heartbroken. I was alone. I fought to survive that first hit on me, until January of the following year came. I was browsing the then new Friendster when the name of his sister popped into my mind. I tried to look for his sister’s profile but I was not able to find it. After going through all my old friends’ names, I finally typed in JR’s name. Alas! There was his account, but I hesitated to add him. Does he still know me? Are we still friends? I worried. And many more what ifs ran through me. The next thing I knew, I had clicked on “Add as Friend”.

After two days, he was already on my friends’ list. And another friend—that happened to be JR’s another account, invited me. The funny thing was that he added me first before realizing I already gave an invite to his other account. Soul mates?

From then on, we exchanged emails and messages. He didn’t have a phone so there’s no other choice. Our endless stories filled our e-mail inbox. He shared how the death of his mom turned his life around. He confessed the wrong things that he had done in the past. He asked for my advice. Then I shared how my lost love was affecting me at that time. He also knew how frustrated I was because I was not taking the field that I wanted for my career. But then, how happy I was, my old friend Meynard came back. In one of his first emails, he mentioned that he was grateful, too—because he found a new Ate, after his sister settled down.

The Fairster Moment
It was the time of the week-long event in UP—the Fair. He told me he wanted to go there so we set one night—a Wednesday night. After almost three years, we would finally meet each other again. But the details were not set properly—our meeting place, our dress code, etc. We didn’t know what to expect. I was not sure if I still knew his face. So was he.

My friend and I were calmly sitting on the ground and watching the bands when we noticed a group of guys looking maliciously at us. So my friend grabbed my hand, stood up, and led me to . . . nowhere. Our only goal was to hide from the bad guys. We were roaming around the sound system at the middle of the green field of Sunken Garden when I suddenly stopped as I noticed two guys walking towards our way. The semilong-haired guy saw me, stopped walking, and closely looked at me. So I stared at him too. “Tonton?” “Donna?” It was him! Finally! And the most memorable night for the two of us was marked.

I was just trying to get over with my unsuccessful relationship, so I didn’t consciously think of JR as a potential boyfriend. For JR, we were just casual friends. But after that Fairster moment, he said he couldn’t help but think of me. (awww.)

Moving On
We continued to be very close friends. He said he found the best friend that he was looking for. We communicated every time we were not busy in school. He called me when he had extra coins. He borrowed phone from his board mates just to text me. We talked on YM while he was doing his projects on the net café. We saw each other on concerts and gigs. We spent evenings on Intramuros’ walls when we wanted to talk about serious things. And we shared cups of coffee in my house on early mornings. He had nothing else to offer me but his time, effort, and true friendship. No flowers, no chocolates, no gifts. But he did something great—he helped me get back to my self again.

I could not deny that I was always looking forward to our next meeting or conversation. Unconsciously, I was able to move on. My heart started to open its doors again. So I kept on praying to God for guidance. If what I’m feeling is really for JR, then please cleanse my heart; take away all the hurt and guilt; and prepare it for a new relationship.

Mission Accomplished
September came. It was my 19th birthday. Before, I would always expect big gifts. But when JR gave me a small Toblerone two days earlier, I felt completely happy. Simple joys, they say. His sincere “happy birthday” and sweet smile were already big for me.

Then I called my friends, including JR, for a party on October 2. Many of my high school friends came—especially those who were aware of what’s going on between me and JR. Haha! That moment was embarrassing—they were teasing JR the whole night! I could see how he tried to manage the situation. Fortunately he did.

It was 7am of October 3 when they went home. Hayy. I was blessed enough to have a wonderful celebration a year after my tragic birthday (because it was on my eighteenth birthday when my I experienced that heartbreak). I took a rest the whole day. It was a Sunday, so when afternoon came, we prepared to go to the chapel. But JR called, and told me he’d drop by. He said he wanted to show his newly bought shoes. After an hour, he arrived and proudly showed me the fruit of his hard work. Yes, he deserved a new pair of shoes since he became a scholar (a.k.a. dean’s list) for the past two terms. Together with my sisters, JR and I went to the chapel. Everything was normal until the peace-giving moment came. I was bowing my head to the person in front of me, at my right, at my back, and lastly to him. But guess what he did! He went close to my ear and whispered . . . I love you! My blood suddenly went up to my head. What?! I couldn’t say any other word. It took me minutes to absorb what he said. And then I turned my eyes to the altar, prayed again to God. This is it!

We went back to our house. JR handed me a nine-page letter so I went out to read it alone. There he narrated how it all started, how his love for me grew, and how he finally decided to go for it. For the nth time, I was deeply touched by JR. And I think, of all the letters that I had read, his was the most sincere.

I wanted everything to be settled in a nice way. So I told him to meet me at the Walls the following day. We did. After rushing a problem set for one of my major subjects, I hurriedly went to Intramuros to see him. I was haggard that time, but who cares?! We talked. One by one, I described to him how I felt during the past months.

Finally, he asked me to be his girlfriend. I didn’t know what exactly made me say yes. Maybe it was his smile; or his “bolero-yet-truthful” lines; or his straight-to-the-eye "mahal kita" punch; or maybe, simply the connection between us. And the story of Ming and Chik started to unfold.

------####------------

From then until now, it’s still US. We fight, we argue, we get angry. But more than the trials we’ve experienced, we have already collected good memories—which are not easy to put to waste.

I would never forget the last time we had a big misunderstanding, (just a few weeks back)—we agreed that we must not forget that we are best friends. “We’re a couple when we want sweet moments. But we’re best friends when we need to talk about our lives, as individuals.”

Happy Fairster Day Ming!

PHOTO SLIDESHOW: My First Trip to Bora

Thanks to Rockyou!

Bora Here I Come!

Yihee! We are going to Bora later. Yeba.